


A moment or two

by boleyn13



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Crushes, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Jealousy, M/M, Post Episode s17e16 Star-Struck Victims, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-27 02:44:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12072003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boleyn13/pseuds/boleyn13
Summary: There had been a moment. They’ve had a moment. Sonny was sure of it. Impossible to miss. Unfortunately Liv had ruined it. Well, not exactly Liv but the jury. Who cares anyway – Barba and him, Sonny Carisi, had had a moment.Set immediately after Episode 17/16 Star-Struck Victims:  Sonny is sure that Barba and him had a moment when he had tried to tell him that he admired his suicidal streak. They had gotten interrupted, so now it's up to Sonny to recreate it and make most of it.





	A moment or two

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everybody,
> 
> My first SVU fic, I hope guys will enjoy it :)
> 
> Have fun :D

There had been a moment. They’ve had a moment. Sonny was sure of it. Impossible to miss. Unfortunately Liv had ruined it. Well, not exactly Liv but the jury. Who cares anyway – Barba and him, Sonny Carisi, had had a moment.

Right there in the courthouse. Sonny hadn’t even planned it. Well, sure, he had been planning on having a moment with Barba in general. Among other plans. Like getting married, spending their honeymoon in Rome and moving into a lovely penthouse together. Those of course were distant, far away in the future kind of plans. But they were plans nonetheless.

The planned for moment had involved a different setting, but Sonny wasn’t going to complain. It had only been his intention to thank Barba for helping him, because let’s be serious – if Sonny passed the bar, it was thanks to Barba. Like every time Sonny’s mouth got the better of him and he hadn’t been able to suppress the flirty undertone in his words when he had told Barba that he admired his suicidal streak. Sonny had intended to say his ‘selfless sense of justice’, but Barba had been smirking, so Sonny wouldn’t dare to correct him.

A smirk, Barba’s smooth voice that was clearly flirtatious. Sonny smirking back. It was the definition of a moment. Until Liv told them that the jury was back and with them Barba’s miserable mood. Sonny had still had the foolish hope that the jury would ignore the worst testimony ever and they would convict these scumbags nonetheless.

That hadn’t happened.

Which was horrible, a poor girl didn’t get justice and Barba looked completely destroyed. Yes, Sonny knew that Barba’s frame of mind shouldn’t be a priority, not in a case like this. But they’ve had a moment today and Barba wore a look on his face like we wanted to drown himself in the Hudson.

Again, not the right thing to think about, but Sonny couldn’t help himself, his imagination was already running wild. By now he knew Barba well enough to be sure that the ADA was going to comfort himself over the loss with a few glasses of ridiculously expensive bourbon. Drinking alone was a terrible idea, it only made a person feel worse. Barba was in need of a friend and Sonny was gladly volunteering for that position tonight. Maybe, hopefully, if God was kind, if Sonny managed to cheer Barba up, there would be another moment.

Barba would feel bad, Sonny would tell him that he was a great lawyer, an even better person and that nobody could have won that case, but it was a sign of character and strength that Barba had taken it on. It was also a sign of megalomania, but Barba had every damn right to think of himself as awesome and completely amazing, because he was. That would make Barba smile and then he would tell Sonny that he didn’t think he was an idiot after all. Barba saying something like that counted as another moment, right?

Since the first one had ended in such a bad way, the second had to be better. Maybe Sonny would even gather up the courage to kiss him. Yeah that was selfish and Sonny was aware that he was a little bit trying to take advantage of Barba’s loss, but he planned to spend the rest of his life worshipping Barba and doing everything that might make him happy. So taking a tiny little bit of advantage was okay. Sonny had the best intentions.

Sonny was ready to immediately walk up to Barba after the trial, but Liv seemed to be reading his mind and for some reason decided that she was having none of it. Okay, that was definitely not the case, but Sonny was nevertheless frustrated when she caught up with him before he could even say a single word to Barba.

Paperwork. Still waiting at the precinct. He had neglected it the last couple of days. Get it done now. Her timing couldn’t be worse and Sonny opened his mouth to protest, then it took only one glance from Liv and he knew better than to do that.

Accepting his fate Sonny rushed back and did the sloppiest work he had ever done. For him all that mattered was to get it done quickly, so he could leave again and join Barba at the bar. Thinking about him, jugging drinks and being miserable made Sonny’s heart sink. Even if he wasn’t going to be able to recreate another moment tonight, he didn’t want Barba to be alone. Despite his constant ‘I am the stone cold ADA and I shrug bad days off like nothing’ attitude, Sonny knew better. Barba would try to eat his own heart out for not being able to get that young woman justice.

The second Sonny was done signing the last paper, he threw his pen away and jumped up to his feet. A twenty minute drive to Barba’s favourite bar, he had only lost one hour. While still on his way Sonny had to deal with the most terrible and unsettling thoughts. Like Barba perhaps had decided to get drunk somewhere else. Or he was already heading home. That would be too much for Sonny to take. By the time he arrived at the bar Sonny was almost feeling paranoid, but he managed not to storm in to finally see that he wasn’t here for nothing.

Barba was sitting at the bar, glass of scotch in hand. Tie loose, jacket on the stool next to him. Thank god. Sonny was going to mention this in his prayers.

Too bad, now that he knew that Barba was indeed here, now that he could see him, Sonny’s nerves were catching up to him. So many ways to fuck it all up. A couple of hours ago everything had worked fine, why shouldn’t it now?

Clearing his throat Sonny adjusted his jacket, ran one hand through his hair and then slowly made his way over to Barba. Cool. Casual. He wasn’t here to make this the first day of the rest of lives together. No, just here to have a drink.

“Counselor.”

Wonderful, Sonny hadn’t choked on his own tongue, he was off to a good start.

Barba turned his head and his eyebrows went up. “Detective. What a coincidence.”

“Yeah, after today I was in need for a drink and I figured I’d do it here. Best chance of not being alone.” That was as close to the truth as Sonny could get, but Barba didn’t seem to particularly care for his motives. “Can’t argue with you on this one. Perfect day to have a drink.” Raising his glass Barba made a little gesture and then downed it in one go.

Exactly like Sonny had expected. Unfortunately he hadn’t taken into consideration how bad he would feel seeing Barba like that. Surrounded by a big cloud of disgust and self-loathing. That didn’t work with Barba. That man was supposed to fill every room with swagger and awesomeness.

“It was a tough case… like I’ve said before, she was a terrible victim, but you did the right thing. At least you tried to give her justice… she was in her own way. Pretty much everything was against us from the very beginning.” That was a good start, right?

Barba huffed softly. “Still admiring my suicidal streak?”

30 seconds and Barba was already making Sonny smile despite looking completely miserable himself. Costume made for Sonny. Indeed. “You did something for somebody else, because you knew it was the right thing to do. Although things were looking grim. That’s admirable. Not a lot of people would have done that.”

“Look at that – Detective Carisi is right about something.” Barba smirked, but it lacked all of its usual bite. “You know why not a lot of people would have done that? Because they would have known that it was impossible to win.”

“You knew that too and you went for it anyway. I don’t like repeating myself, but I’ll say it again. It’s admirable.”

In response Barba snorted. “It’s stupid. That’s what it is.”

“One thing doesn’t rule out the other.”

Instead of answering Barba gave the little bartender a little sign. No words were necessary, because only five seconds later a new glass of scotch was placed in front of Barba. Being a regular definitely had its advantages. “What can I get you?”

Technically it was better for Sonny to stay sober, but he couldn’t hang out with Barba at the bar without drinking anything. “Same please.”

The bartender nodded and Sonny got his own glass of scotch. Just that one glass while the bartender put a little bowl full of cashew nuts in front of Barba. “Here you go, counselor.”

One sentence and one glance were enough to make Sonny’s eyebrows go up so high that they almost met his hairline. Sonny couldn’t help himself, his detective skills were always doing his job. First thing that rubbed him the wrong way – the bartender was calling Barba ‘counselor’. Okay, that wasn’t so bad. Barba was a regular and working 24/7. There was no doubt that he definitely had brought work to the bar as well. So the bartender could know what Barba was doing for a living.

Second thing which was way worse than ‘counselor’. The smile on those lips put a sour taste into Sonny’s mouth. Sure, a bartender better had to be friendly to score good tips, but there could be too much of a good thing. Sonny appreciated competent and nice service staff… unless their smiles were unmistakably flirty. And directed at Barba. Fine, perhaps Sonny wouldn’t mind if the bartender was some ugly, toothless scarecrow. Not so much the case here. Black hair, steel blue eyes, nice features and perfectly white teeth. Sonny could almost see his reflection in those perfectly white teeth. Couldn’t that guy stop smiling at Sonny’s ADA? Couldn’t he see that they were trying to have a moment here?

“Thank you, Jake.” Barba muttered and picked up two of the nuts to put them into his mouth. All while Sonny was trying not to fall off his stool. Okay, so Barba was at first name basis with his bartender. That wasn’t… upsetting at all. Not like he had known Barba now for almost two years and was still referred to as ‘Detective’ or ‘Carisi’. The bartender couldn’t be doing things that much different. He was serving Barba drinks, Sonny was bringing him coffee on a regular basis. Sure, that wasn’t as good as scotch, but he couldn’t get Barba drunk during working hours. That would be unprofessional.

“Detective?”

Startled Sonny tore his eyes off the bartender and looked at Barba who was holding his glass in his hand. Oh, right.

“Cheers, counselor.”

Finally content Barba nodded and they both took a gulp from their glasses. The scotch was smooth, unsurprising, Barba only drank the best stuff. Even when he was drowning his sorrows. Back to the plan, the bartender was busy with other customers anyway.

“I meant it, you know.” Sonny stated softly and then cleared his throat because his voice sounded rather hoarse. “Yeah, you lost the case and that sucks. Nonetheless you did a good thing and it matters.”

Barba was already halfway done with his scotch, but the alcohol didn’t reduce his ability to give Sonny his most patronizing gaze. Something was definitely wrong with Sonny, no sane person could think that this was hot. “Fine, it was a long day and I may be a little intoxicated, so I’ll ask. How does my tremendous failure matter?”

“You went after an influential, public figure who also happens to be rich. That will show other predators in similar positions that they aren’t safe.” Sonny genuinely believed that. He couldn’t see any other ADA than Barba taking on similar cases. Despite his sometimes cold and admittedly dickish behaviour… Barba as person was as good as it gets. Rather unusual for a lawyer. Absolutely amazing…

Sonny just hoped that Barba also saw himself that way. Right now he definitely didn’t. Judging by his face Sonny had no idea what Barba was thinking. “Yes, I can hear them trembling with fear now that I lost that case thanks to the fastest verdict ever delivered by a jury…”

Okay, Barba was trying to make this hard for him, Sonny could deal with that. Hell, Sonny was willing to put up with a lot more if it got him their penthouse with elegant blue curtains. Somehow Sonny was sure that Barba would like blue curtains. Smiling at Barba Sonny shrugged. “This time. Sometimes justice is indeed blind. Sadly… This time they got away, but you’ve sent a message. That there are still people left who won’t let entitled assholes do whatever they want. That some people, ADAs with a suicidal streak like you, don’t shy away from pointing their finger at them. That matters.”

When the last word slipped past Sonny’s lips he could see the constant frown on Barba’s forehead soften. Definitely one of the most beautiful sights that Sonny had ever seen. The perfect premise to create another moment. Sonny couldn’t let loose now, although he thought that Barba wouldn’t be able to hear him. Fuck his stupid heart for beating so loudly. Ridiculous. Sonny could interrogate rapists, murderers or child molesters for hours without breaking a sweat. Making Barba a compliment was way more difficult.

“At least it matters to me. To know that all our work isn’t in vain, although the cases are… almost hopeless, because everybody else is afraid to stand up to a movie star, corrupt politician or… bad cops. Not everybody has the ba… the courage to deal with that. You’re not just doing it because of your ego, but because you know it’s the right thing to do. That’s… great. You’re… great.”

Incredibly stupid to use the same word two times in a row. There were hundreds of adjectives to choose from that would describe Barba. Wonderful. Amazing. Awesome. Inspiring. Admirable. Dazzling. Stunning. Impressive. Marvellous. Gorgeous.

Great sounded least like ‘I’ve a crush on you from the first second I saw you, then I wanted to be you, now I just want to be with you and why aren’t we dating yet?’.

Barba’s lips were slightly parted. Of course, Barba was way too dignified to let his mouth drop completely open in astonishment. Had Sonny gone too far? Damn, he should have started slower.

Silence. There was never silence with Barba. Sonny had fucked up. There went his moment. Up in flames. Lost forever.

“Geez, detective… You don’t have to lay it on that thick. I am not really suicidal…” Barba smirked again, this time in amusement and Sonny couldn’t the blush creeping up his cheeks. The bartender walked past them, glancing at Barba and Sonny needed all of his willpower to not bare his teeth and hiss at him.

Right next to Barba. Pathetic.

Sonny flinched when he suddenly felt a warm hand on his wrist. Barba was touching him and smiling. Without bite or snark. God, that man was gorgeous. “But seriously… thanks, detective.”

A warm, pleasant feeling spread inside of Sonny’s belly which he refused to call butterflies. Sonny was too old for that. “You’re welcome, counselor. I meant it.”

Barba’s hand was still on his wrist, his eyes on Sonny’s face, he was still smiling and Sonny’s heart was hammering inside of his chest, his skin was tingling… Oh, that was the moment! Moments were fleeting, so Sonny had to be quick. Should he ask him out on a date? Ask to walk him home? Or just kiss him straight away?

That smile…

Fuck it, Sonny would kiss him. Barba was right there, in front of him, all Sonny had to do was to lean forward and…

“You need anything, counselor?”

The bartender was back, brutally tearing their wonderful moment apart into tiny little confetti. All while smiling charmingly at Barba who had pulled his hand away from Sonny’s wrist. That was enough!

“No, he doesn’t need anything! Except for a moment of privacy, please!”

That didn’t get Sonny a smile, only a scowl, but at least the bartender left them alone again. Sonny couldn’t quite believe it when he heard Barba chuckling. Oh god. His life was over. This was beyond embarrassing.

“Detective, I didn’t know you were an expert on what I need.”

Barba, his Barba, was teasing him. Sonny’s mouth ran dry. Okay, this wasn’t a moment... Who needs a moment anyway? “I knew what to say to make you feel better, didn’t I?”

Strangely enough Barba almost looked intrigued. “Alright… go on.”

After clearing his throat for the 21st time that night Sonny managed put together a coherent sentence. “Dinner would make you feel better. Tomorrow night. 8 o’clock. With me. I’ll pick you up.”

Barba took his time, the longest seconds of Sonny’s life. He was on the edge of backing out when Barba nodded. “Okay. No Italian place in Staten Island though. I am not leaving this island.”

This was real. Barba had just agreed to go out with him. This was really happening. Sonny couldn’t screw this up. Every part of his body wanted to wrap himself around Barba and reassure him that it was going to be the most wonderful evening of his life… Bad idea. To stop himself from doing so Sonny quickly downed his drink and out of the corner of his eyes he could see the bartender glaring at him.

For the rest of the night Sonny wasn’t able to stop smiling.


End file.
